Jun 8

Jun 8 ¡Hola Papi!: How to Come Out in a Walmart Parking Lot and Other Life Lessons

Author: John Paul Brammer
Publisher: Simon & Schuster
Goodreads | The StoryGraph

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Note: Content and trigger warnings are provided for those who need them at the bottom of this page. If you don’t need them and don’t want to risk spoilers, don’t scroll past the full review.

Cover Description

The first time someone called John Paul (JP) Brammer “Papi” was on the popular gay hookup app Grindr. At first, it was flattering; JP took this as white-guy speak for “hey, handsome.” Who doesn’t want to be called handsome? But then it happened again and again…and again, leaving JP wondering: Who the hell is Papi?

What started as a racialized moniker given to him on a hookup app soon became the inspiration for his now wildly popular advice column “¡Hola Papi!,” launching his career as the Cheryl Strayed for young queer people everywhere—and some straight people too. JP had his doubts at first—what advice could he really offer while he himself stumbled through his early 20s? Sometimes the best advice to dole outcomes from looking within, which is what JP has done in his column and book—and readers have flocked to him for honest, heartfelt wisdom, and of course, a few laughs.

In ¡Hola Papi!, JP shares his story of growing up biracial and in the closet in America’s heartland, while attempting to answer some of life’s toughest questions: How do I let go of the past? How do I become the person I want to be? Is there such a thing as being too gay? Should I hook up with my grade school bully now that he’s out of the closet? Questions we’ve all asked ourselves, surely.

With wit and wisdom in equal measure, ¡Hola Papi! is for anyone—gay, straight, and everything in between—who has ever taken stock of their unique place in the world, offering considered advice, intelligent discourse, and fits of laughter along the way.

TL;DR Review

¡Hola Papi! is a funny, compassionate memoir-in-essays full of personality and heart.

For you if: You are looking to read a really great LGBTQ / Latinx memoir.

Full Review

Thank you, Simon and Schuster, for sending me a review copy of ¡Hola Papi!. I was hooked from the very first page, and I truly loved it all the way through. (A note for the reader that the book’s title and cover art are meant to be subversions and reclamations of stereotypes, and once you read the book, they will make perfect sense.)

John Paul (JP) Brammer, a Mexican-American writer who runs a beloved queer advice column also called ¡Hola Papi!, has written us a memoir-in-essays that’s as warm and compassionate as it is impactful — and funny. Each chapter is framed as an advice-column-type response to a fictional question about race, queerness, and various aspects of identity, and each will leave you with something special.

In this way, we learn about JP’s life, from his childhood in a small, rural, intensely homophobic town to learning how to live as a gay man to struggling as a queer writer in New York City. And while every chapter feels like a hug for us as readers, he’s clearly also hugging his past self — it is truly a pleasure to witness the warmth and tenderness he feels for that past self alongside anyone else who had similar experiences. In fact, that’s what gives this book so much magic. He writes intimately and tenderly but also clearly and compellingly. And again, it’s really funny. And just so good.

I loved this book so much, and I think anyone else who reads it will love it, too.